Anonymous said: This week my boyfriend who I was with for 3 years broke up with me ... I feel completely lost and miserable ! We were having problems for the past few months but recently we agreed we'd try to work things out and I thought we were moving forward until he made it clear he didn't want to try anymore.... I'm trying to keep my mind off it but a lot of my close friends are away or out of the country and I just feel so alone ...I'm just not really sure how to get through this any advice ?
See a counsellor. I know that it seems like a big step but it really isn’t. I honestly think everyone at some point should go talk to one. Why? It’s someone completely outside of your life, with an unbiased view, who has to be on your side. What more could you need right now?
3 years is a long time and I know the hardest part is being without what was your best friend for that length of time. Different things help different people but I often have a glass or two of wine (not more - I am not recommending taking solace in a bottle!) and reflect on myself at this time, what I can do to make my life easier, better. A hot bath, a manicure, a new dress. I find that easing the pain just a little knocks the edge off and helps me see the future a little softer.
Otherwise, go to the gym - pound that treadmill, take it out on a boxing bag, get all the emotion out.
Right now, it’s probably hour by hour. All the cliches are true - one door closes and another opens but right now you’re blinded with pain and can’t really see that. I have dozens of posts here on the various things I’ve done and advised others to do, have a look through if you have the time.
Know that he walked away because something better is waiting in the wings. I know this because every single, solitary time, every heartbreak I’ve gone through (and there are soooo many - just nursing one right now) have proven this to be true.
Right now I’m hurting, I’ve been rejected and even though I knew he wasn’t good enough for me, everyone knows that sting, like the knife being twisted. I keep reminding myself that it’s ok, and I’ve done this before. Life’s a little tricky, heartbreak is a BITCH but we are better than all of this, and you are.
Feel free to send me rambling emails asking the whys and hows and how shit you feel. That’s what I’m here for, that’s why I started this blog and it makes me feel better knowing (or at least hoping) that I can help, a little, in some way.